Category: Generously shared stories by others

No Limits!

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Image by me (Fiona)
Words by me, based on an interview with Jessy.

Imagine, if you will, putting a post on linked in that was a bit out of our comfort zone. A sensitive topic. And going to bed pleased that it had 10 likes instead of your typical 2 or 3…

Then imagine waking up the next morning to 150,000 views!

And within 3 weeks that post had been seen by 19 million people.

At the time I am writing this, Jessy has had almost 600,000 likes and almost 40,000 comments on that post. She has over 11,000 followers.

In her own words “it changed my life and opened me up to things that I just what didn’t necessarily have before”.

Jessy grew up in a small town and had grown up feeling quite alone and without much support. She went through some awful experiences as an adult. Jessy told me “I’ve never ever felt in my life, like I had friends and for the first time in my life, I do”.

Stepping out of her comfort zone had been a ‘one day’ thing for Jessy “Oh, it’d be nice to do one day. I’ll do it when time permits. I would love to be a bit more bold.”

The LinkedIn post in question was not something Jessy planned. She wrote from her heart, and that comes through in her words.

Jessy is using the platform she now has to “let other people live their truth and be proud of who they are. I want people to feel empowered, to trust themselves, to bet on themselves. And to really promote that self love. The best way I can describe it is that I truly believe that when you start feeling happier about yourself, your capabilities, and your self worth, I truly believe that that flows onto how you feel about other people and how you want other people to succeed. So I’m very much about holding accountability, holding ourselves accountable for our own happiness and our own successes.” The passion and care in Jessy shone brightly as she described her goals to me.

I asked Jessy what had changed for her in the past 3 weeks “the biggest thing for me has been that I wake up every morning and I’m so excited. I’m so excited to create content. I’m constantly making new videos, having conversations, writing blog posts. I just want to start now!

“My life has changed because I feel like, for the first time ever, now is the time that I can do something. I’ve met some amazing people with some amazing stories and my life is forever better for it. 

“I’m constantly growing and I do enjoy learning and developing myself as a person, but I never realised how much I loved hearing and learning about other people until now. So I’m very excited!”

Jessy also learned that she is a lot tougher than she thought! She was scared to post her story for fear people would agree with those that had bullied her. “Actually, I have had that. Of course, you’re not going to get a post be viewed by so many people and not get any negativity, and I have had that. But I’ve realised that I can take a lot more than I can thought. For example (really sorry about my language) I had a message yesterday from someone saying ‘yeah, but you’re an effing fat whale.’

“I think that two weeks ago, I would have been so crushed by that. But now I’m thinking, actually, you’ve gone out of your way to do that! I’ve clearly made you feel something. So therefore my message is still correct, that people need to start making other people uncomfortable, so that things can start improving.”

As always, I asked Jessy for advice for someone thinking about stepping out of their comfort zone “In terms of stepping out of your comfort zone. I genuinely believe that it can go good or it can go bad, but it’s only going to go as bad as you let it. I don’t mean to sound so corny, but everything is a lesson. I think it’s the attitude that is really important. And if you’re going to go all that way, stepping out of your comfort zone, you may as well make it so epic, that you are so proud of it.”

Jessy admitted her answer today is different than it would have been to w weeks ago, but it included “Do it!

“If it hadn’t worked out, I think I wouldn’t have been that worse off.”

Self-limiting beliefs hold people back and “And so that’s why you should step out of your comfort zone and you should do things that scare you or is not normal for you. Because then it helps you grow as a person and helps you realise what your limitations are. You can start pushing them and really the only thing you’re doing is opening yourself up to more new opportunities.”

Thank you, Jessy,!

A bit about Jessy:

Jessy is a Marketing professional embarking on a self love journey and looking for others to join her. She started The Emotion Exchange as a safe place for professionals to gather together to learn, grow and empower each other. Jessy hopes that within the group everyone is able to share their experience and expertise, change the stigma of emotions and tears to be turned into a positive and allow professionals to grow into the leaders they deserve to be.

https://www.linkedin.com/groups/8952417

Invisible Expectations

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Words by me based on an interview with Carly.
Image by me (Fiona)

Carly reflected on comfort zones and what they mean when I invited her to be interviewed for this blog. “I was thinking about my experience and what is the comfort zone. And more to the point, why do we call it a comfort zone because it’s really not a comfortable place to be? 

“And having the courage to make a change or try something in a different way might feel a bit challenging or uncomfortable or scary before we take the plunge. But as soon as you take that first step, you feel really liberated and energised. And it’s almost like a return to who you really are. I feel like that’s the difference between living and existing.”

Carly’s experience that she chose to share was her decision to take a break from alcohol “I had found myself in a place where I was really unhappy. And I felt like I was sort of stuck in a rut where I was working really hard all week – working long hours in quite an intense, stressful role.

“Then the weekend would come and I couldn’t wait to get out of the office and go and have a drink with friends and then I’d party through the weekend, and then Monday would come and I’d be back at square one.

“I was ‘healthy’ by societal standards, I wasn’t drinking every night, I wasn’t considered an alcoholic. But looking back, it wasn’t a healthy way of living at all”

A traumatic event found Carly reflecting on how she was living her life and she came to the conclusion that alcohol was holding her back. “Then I started to think ‘Alright, well maybe I’ll just have a break’ I didn’t set out to stop drinking for a week or a month or three months – there were no rules. I decided that I would have a break and see how that felt.”

Making that decision brought up a lot of uncomfortable questions for Carly “You’ve got this dinner with these people – so how do I do that? Or we’ve got that work thing. And then questioning – do you do you really have to drink at those events? Because I would always have thought ‘Yeah, of course I do.’

“And that’s how we operate in society, in the circles that I was in, my family and in my workplaces. It made me realise not only how normalised it was, but also had me questioning whether there was a bit of identity wrapped up in that.

“So, who am I if I’m not that fun party girl? Who am I if I’m not this person who drinks socially? And how is that going to be perceived?

“I also realised that under that there was a bit of fear of being seen in a different way, or a fear of letting that go. And then I realised how ridiculous both of those things were.

“Wondering would my friends still want to hang out with me if I wasn’t going to be drinking, and realising how ridiculous that was.”

Carly decided to just try it. No rules made, more experimental, an exploration, something that took courage in stepping away from the comfort zone and what was considered ‘normal’.

“I was quite amazed after getting past those initial ‘challenges’ that they were really not real. And I wasn’t held to anything. And realising that I did still enjoy that lunch. And people did still talk to me at the at the work event, the wedding, the social event. And furthermore, there was now a more valuable conversation to be had.”

Carly found that this step out of her comfort zone had a ripple effect of choices that were made from a place of selfcare – decisions that have led to a new job, a new home, and a deeper connection with nature and exercise.

She also started questioning the unspoken expectations – from something as simple as leaving a dinner when you are tired rather than waiting for an ‘acceptable’ time to leave.

For people considering a step out of their comfort zone Carly has this advice “It comes down to connecting to the meaning and purpose behind what you’re doing and what that means to you, and who you really are. Because if you’re stepping out of your comfort zone for you, then the minute that you take that step, it’s going to feel completely liberating, and you’ll feel supported and so free and alive. You’ll be completely energised and you’ll never look back.

“But I think if you were stepping out of your comfort zone out of pressure or out of expectation, or because you feel that you ‘should’ do something for someone else – I don’t know how that will go. It probably would not feel as true”

Carly finished with a reminder that the comfort zone may be familiar – but it is not really that comfortable! And she raised an enquiry: “Why is it that we seek comfort over personal growth?”

Get Messy

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Image by me (Fiona)
Words by me based on an interview with Stacey

Stacey loves to challenge herself! She says it comes from the example her Dad set.

“My Dad started his business when I was only a few years old. So I didn’t know anything different. He built it into a very successful company and sold it many years later.

Over the years, I saw the hard work and sacrifice. But he used to say how fun it was too!

I always knew I wanted to have my own business one day. My Dad was my inspiration. I was drawn to the freedom of being my own boss — I’m a very independent person and freedom is one of my biggest values.”

Despite the goal and inspiration being there from an early age, Stacey’s journey to becoming a business owner took many more years! She started out her career in the corporate world. An ambitious high-performer, she worked her way up into her first management role in her mid-20’s.

But as her 30’s approached Stacey gave herself a deadline!

She stepped out of her comfort zone, leaving her corporate job days before her 30th birthday with the goal of starting her own recruitment business.

Doing the right thing by her former employer, Stacey had a 6 month break. Being very risk averse, she also took the time to do her due diligence and make sure her business was financially viable before opening the doors.

Although her business quickly became a success, it wasn’t always easy. ‘I’m a very self-motivated person but I think it’s a real shock when you first step out on your own. You’re no longer accountable to a pay cheque, having to be at your desk at 8am each morning, a boss, or anything like that!”

5 years after starting her consulting business, Stacey began to feel like something was missing. “I wasn’t fulfilled by my work and knew I had to find something more meaningful.” After months of exploration, she retrained as a professional coach and pivoted her business!

“I’m naturally a very driven. I love to challenge myself and always want to do and achieve more. But it has to be aligned and fulfilling — I have to be energised, fired up and passionate about what I’m doing.”

Stacey finds being challenged helps her learn and grow — both of which are very important to her. “When I start to stagnate and feel that’s not there anymore, then I’m ready to take on the next challenge.”

I asked Stacey what advice she would give to someone considering a step out of their comfort zone and she shared “Ask yourself — ‘What have you got to lose? And how much more do you have to gain?’

“You can choose to stay where you are, playing it safe, doing what you’ve always done. Or, you can choose to step outside your comfort zone. It’s not going to be the easiest path and it will be scary — but the benefits far outweigh the initial fear.

“So, I would say take the leap — just do it.

“I’ve learned, particularly in recent years, that life is short — and it’s there to be lived. You can’t do that by staying in your comfort zone. You need to get uncomfortable, get messy sometimes to truly experience life and all it has to offer.”

Great advice Stacey — thank you!

Stacey Back — Profile Careers

Stacey Back is the Founder of Profile Careers and a professional coach + mentor to aspiring and early stage consultants. She helps them launch and grow their own consulting businesses and develop their careers. Stacey’s professional background includes ten years’ in consulting with international companies in Australia and the UK. After a career in corporate sales, HR and recruitment, she founded her own successful consulting business in 2013, before launching Profile Careers in 2018. For the past 12 years, Stacey has coached hundreds of professionals and entrepreneurs, supporting them to execute their professional goals. Her approach is highly strategic and based on the proven methods used successfully in her own career and business. She is passionate about sharing the lessons from her own journey to success to help others achieve the same

Understand your why

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A waterbird sitting in the middle of a pool of water
Words by me (Fiona) based on an interview with Brian.
Image by me.

Brian didn’t feel that stepping out of his comfort zone was a choice. He had reached a point in his life where his high-powered career was costing him physically, emotionally and mentally. He had a tipping point at an international airport, and the story he shared is what happened after that.

As a little back story – Brian moved to Australia with his family as a transfer for the company he was working for in South Africa. Shortly after he arrived the dotcom crash meant he had to close his division! He continued on for 12 months before moving to an IT security business where he moved from ops director to COO to being part of running the Asian arm of the company. By this point he was away more than home, and this was having an impact on his relationships with his family and others.

It was sitting in Bangalore airport that Brian found himself silently crying – pointed out to him by a stranger! “And I’m embarrassed to say that I now realize I was having an emotional breakdown in Bangalore airport. And that I was living an unaligned and therefore unsustainable life. I was getting paid a lot of money but I was disconnected from family and friends. I was unhealthy physically, mentally, emotionally, and it just all came to a head.”

Brian feels that, since then, the next 12 years has included two parallel journeys – one above the line and one below the line. The below the line journey was about better understanding his struggle with anxiety and depression and being able to manage ‘it’, rather than ‘it’ continuing to manage him. The above the line journey was all about “becoming the person I was designed to be. We all are unique. And it’s about really trying to understand how that all comes together into some sort of uniqueness”. This above the line journey has led to Brian becoming an ‘Alignment and Movement Strategist’.

Some of Brian’s above the line journey was accidental. An offer of a senior position at a big company fell through at the last minute. Taking that job would have led to a different outcome “I don’t think I would have survived. I know it wasn’t right for me.

“Increasingly though, I am living a life of increased intentionality, and a lot of what I help my clients to do is live more intentionally too.”

Six years ago, Brian started his own practice, as an Alignment and Movement Strategist, and has not looked back!

His advice for anyone planning – or being forced – to move out of their comfort zone?

“Don’t do it alone. And be kind to yourself.”

Brian also reflected on using what you have experienced rather than always looking forward: “I find that leaders live in the future. It’s part of why they get paid. They’re thinking about what’s coming, what’s happening, preparing themselves, their teams, their business for the future. I think the mindfulness movement has been quite helpful in slowing people down and being more present. However, an area that I think leaders tend not to go is the past. Yet so much learning in the past. Take the time to learn from it.”

“If someone’s wanting to step out of their comfort zone I would love to explore why. And I would say what they want probably has something to do with their backstory and the past”.

“For me part of the intentionality thing is, what is it you are moving away from and what are you moving towards? And appreciating what you have now.”

Brian finished with some last words that I loved: “Really engage with your why!”

A little about Brian:
Brian describes himself an Alignment and Movement Strategist – working as a Mentor, an Executive Coach, a Facilitator, and is passionate about helping both organisations and individuals, operate in a more aligned, more sustainable and therefore more effective manner, with a strong sense of movement in the ‘right’ direction.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/brianrichardgardner

New Horizons

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Picture by me (Fiona)
Words by me based on an interview with Priyani

30 years after migrating to Australia, Priyani headed off once more to accept a 2 year assignment in Thailand!

“Having delivered some quite large projects, the region headquarters asked me to come and do kind of similar work over there. And I thought this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, also to be recognised for having done something felt good . And that was one. Number two was I was coming out of a very difficult and traumatic personal experience. So it was an opportunity for me to move away to a different environment as well.”

Priyani didn’t have much time to think about the big decision – after 2 years of discussion the announcement came while she was travelling overseas, and she had less than a month to move once she found out!

There were so many things to love about living in Thailand – from an apartment from where she could see the office (a very short commute!) to “The office environment was really refreshing. It was even fascinating that it was the same company here. It is a very refreshing culture also, probably because I was coming from the backdrop of very high intensity project delivery, 13 – 14-hour days, working weekends. All of that is very fast paced, very intense, So that was fabulous. Thai people are just absolutely lovely, but we also had about 14 different nationalities working in the office, so it was nice. It was a really good balance. And, I just loved it. I was able to get involved with a few groups outside work and expand my network and volunteer. So many women “expats” and locals who have become really good friends.”

Solo travel was something Priyani also embraced while in Thailand, northern Thailand was special and brought fond memories of growing up in the hill country. Being brave and getting around solo in unfamiliar surrounds was liberating and gave her more confidence.  She built on that by taking a longer holiday alone through Spain which gave her time for personal discovery and reflection but also expanded her boundaries around exploring, doing “her own thing”, finding a “safe spot” that was right for her.

Aside from discovering her strength and courage, Priyani loved how much she learned in this role “the actual work was completely outside my comfort zone. The people I dealt with were much more senior level. I designed and delivered an online training program across seven countries for over 3000 employees within three months! I didn’t know the topic to begin with, I had to study the whole policy from the word go. There were a lot of natural roadblocks – we had to deliver it in three languages, access for everyone to the online platform. It’s fascinating because especially in the Asia Oceania region, there’s so many different cultures. Every country is a different culture and a different language. So again, totally outside the comfort zone, huge learnings, and I really am grateful.”

Priyani has advice for anyone considering stepping out of their comfort zone “Take a risk – you never know what is on the other side”

“I think for me, taking those risks is what has helped. That not being afraid or being worried because sometimes it’s not fear – it’s just about those niggling doubts. It may not be perfect but put your head out of comfort and get in the zone!

 “It’s just opened up fabulous opportunities, amazing horizons that I hadn’t seen before.

“I am grateful for the support that was behind be, with me and ahead of me that helped me learn and grow.”

Thank you Priyani!

Find Your Own Path

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Image by me (Fiona)
Words by me based on an interview with Gordon

Gordon wants to make a difference in the lives of the majority – the 99% not the 1%. He wants to help people achieve extraordinary outcomes. He says he gets called a square peg in a round hole.

I think he is a man with great passions and an unconventional approach!

One of Gordons biggest steps outside his comfort zone was when he put his hand up for a C-suite role in the international firm he worked for. He was only about 20-25% qualified for the position! What Gordon did was obtain the support of the COO and a really respected financial adviser so when he asked for the role he went in with support ready to go! His first task was to make part of the team redundant – so he certainly stayed uncomfortable once he started the role.

Gordon believes that our experiences shape our comfort zones “I think it stems from my childhood.  I think there’s five or six different instances that change your life. Maybe it’s being bullied three times a day school. And the way I got myself out of that was to learn martial art. Then I came to Australia where I didn’t know anyone. And the first question you get asked in Australia is which football team do you support? Which school did you go to? Well, I don’t support an Australian football team. And I’ve never been to an Australian school so I had to find my own way.

“I’m dyslexic, so I can’t read well.  So, I can’t write a book. But I can produce a book, I found a different way to produce a book. And then that book was produced in four days. It cost virtually nothing to produce it. And it’s sold over 4000 copies. And I haven’t paid for any advertising at all. “

Gordons advice is not to follow other people’s paths. That may be the right path for them but not necessarily for you.

The benefits Gordon finds outside of his comfort zone are often side effects! One example is that his wife was very ill, requiring a double lung transplant. Unable to keep working in the corporate world, Gordon discovered a passion for medical science and research – and started a very successful charity as a result!

“Life’s too short, a we’ve got to make every day count. And the last thing we need to do is go to the cemetery wondering what if!

“And when you take that step forward, tell people why you have taken that step. Tell people what it means to you, when you take that step. And what you’ll find very quickly is a group of people (I call it  your ecosystem), who are really supporting you. Supporting you in terms of that advice, that support network, that healthy support network that will encourage people to push through. And what will happen is all those toxic people, those people that love to say no will suddenly disappear. So, do it, ‘just do it’ and take people with you . It’s your pathway, but it’s our journey. I’m here to – help and encourage you and support you along the way. I may not have taken the actual step, the same step as you. But I’ve got experiences.”

Thank you, Gordon, for your great story and outlook.

A little about Gordon:

Gordon Jenkins is an authority on visibility and unconventional business growth. As an executive coach, accomplished entrepreneur, speaker and author of Network with Purpose, he helps entrepreneurs and professionals breakthrough their plateau to achieve sustainable business growth and personal life goals. His intention is to facilitate growth that aligns with an individuals’ values and strengths so they achieve success that is meaningful to them

Gordon’s success and that of his clients stems from the strong belief that it’s okay not to conform to the system, it’s refreshing to be different, and that being a square peg in a round hole is a good thing. He is a supporter of the underdog and his purpose is to help ordinary people achieve extraordinary and meaningful outcomes every day. For more information about Gordon, please visit www.iamgordonjenkins.com or LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/iamgordonjenkins/ There is also a free resource: 30 ways to make networking feel less like work

Writing for your tomorrow

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Story by Fiona based on an interview with Shilpa
Image by Fiona

Until 18 months ago Shilpa was very comfortable in her life. An amazing career spanning 16 years had been everything she wanted. Until she was made redundant.
This was a wake up call for Shilpa – that someone else had control over her career like that.

Shilpa decided to take the opportunity to take back that control and try something completely new – follow her passion into a coaching career!

After years of staying comfortable Shilpa now steps out of her comfort zone on a daily basis!

Today she speaks regularly at public events and live videos. “I was a very shy person. I used to be a loner, very comfortable in my world and with my thoughts. And then I said, ‘Okay, let me go out there and put myself in front of the public. How bad can it be?’

“Speaking from the stage has been a great part of my journey! And today when I’m teaching other people to do the same, I know each of them can do it because I have walked that path myself”

Shilpa took a non-traditional approach to her new career!
“So my initial feeling was okay, this is exciting. And then when I started, the biggest question I faced was ‘where do I get the credibility?’ I had a comfort zone for years; I was fully established there. People knew me, I had the relationships. And how do I create that credibility immediately in this new field when I am doing something totally different? It all came together somehow, but initially there was some, I wouldn’t say fear, but a hesitation whether it would work or not. But then I realised that I had built credibility all along, it was all that commitment, dedication, result orientation, everything that I had built in those 16 years. I just have to pull them along from my previous life and create some amazing results in the new industry and there you go- my credibility was there.“

Well done Shilpa!

There are good reasons why Shilpa regularly challenges herself “When you are sitting in your comfort zone, you get rusty. You’re just do what you know, over and over again. And you feel that you know it all. Whereas the fact is that you’ve not seen the world outside. And slowly you start getting this feeling that I’m comfortable here, but can I survive in the world outside, if required? Ultimately life does throw challenges. But if we can figure out a way to respond to it with whatever we have, that confidence and action orientation is the success mantra. Constantly getting out of your comfort zone, no matter how small the step is, gives you unlimited confidence, those juices which tell you that life is in control, no matter what “

Shilpa’s advice to anyone considering stepping out of their comfort zone is to just do it – don’t look for the 1000 reasons why not to do it, Reasons are for not doing things rather than for doing things.

I also asked Shilpa her favourite part of stepping out of her comfort zone “My favourite bit is the experience. Each of us have our own experiences. And if we go and we embrace more of such experiences, our life becomes richer. I’m not saying that everywhere there will be a win – there will be failures as well. But definitely there will be learnings.”

“So I would say, don’t overthink, JUST DO IT and whether it works or not, the learning you will get out of it, will go a long way in building that story that you’re writing for YOUR tomorrow.”

My favourite quote – “that story that you’re writing for YOUR tomorrow”. How powerful!

About Shilpa:

As a Career Strategist, Peak Performance Coach and #1 International bestselling author of the book “Play it Full”, Shilpa believe that you can attain incredible results in all three aspects of life- Achievements, Health and Relationships. You can have it all!

She is on a mission to impact 1 million people move from the role of a creation to a creator.

Her mentees are rocking their life today by performing at an elevated level, creating outstanding results for themselves.

Shilpa has mastered the magic formula and so is on a war against the average game.

The purpose of her life today is to share this formula, this awesome sauce with the world, so that each person gets an opportunity to fly high and through a ripple effect, it creates an exceptional world for all of us.

Linkedin Profile: www.linkedin.com/in/shilpa-kulshrestha

Push the boat out

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Words and image by me (Fiona)
Words based on an interview with Johnathan

Johnathan is a serial ‘step out of your comfort zoner’, but shared with me one of his 9 career transitions!

He was working as a recruiter: “I’d recently removed from New Zealand to Australia. So I was very fortunate enough to come over with a job when we moved here. I was working in in recruitment but my heart wasn’t really in it, I was getting frustrated with how recruitment worked. But one night I thought I know what a good CV and a good LinkedIn profile and I know what a bad one looks like. No one’s actually telling the candidates this we’re just rejecting, rejecting, rejecting. We’re not actually saying ‘hey, this is what you are doing wrong’, there was nobody providing sort of feedback. I felt that everyone was working for the client as a recruitment consultant, but no one was working for the candidate.

“And so I had a like an epiphany moment as I was sitting on the couch off to the shower and I thought, I’m going to try something tomorrow and I’m going to push this boat out as far as I can before it sinks.”

Johnathan ran with his epiphany immediately, talking ‘the mother of all epic sickies’ the very next day and calling a local school that taught Microsoft technical education. He was able to secure a meeting with the head of the school for that afternoon “I said, ‘hey, look, I’m a career coach. And I specialise in helping people build their technical careers. I’d love to come in and talk to your students, if I can, about how to set themselves up for success.’ “

“He said to me, ‘Well, this sounds like a really good idea. When can you come in and talk to one of my classes and share these tips?’ And I say, well, as luck would have it, I have some time available this afternoon!”

Once there Johnathan told the head of the school about his background and his idea – and found himself in front of the students that same visit!

“The guy said to me, ‘this sounds amazing. Tell you what, I’ve got a class running right now. Do you want to jump in right now and just have a bit of a chat to these students?’”

Despite having nothing prepared, Johnathan continued to push that boat out and spoke to the students for an hour and a half!

“I walked out of there really, really invigorated because I kind of reconnected with my passion. So the interesting thing is that he said to me, at the end of it, ‘look, that was fantastic. When can you come in again, we’d like you to develop a programme.’ And I thought to myself, ‘okay, look, I’ll come back to you on that one’ – because I knew I had to go back to work the next day.

“I was so far outside my comfort zone, but I was being kind of propelled by this energy in this interview. And this, this wow feeling. And at the same time I was also had that voice in the back of my head going, What the hell are you doing?”

This huge day led eventually to the business Jonathan now runs.

Johnathan has some great advice for people thinking about stepping out of their comfort zone “One thing that I teach people is reframing the comfort zone or reframing the tasks that you want to accomplish. We’ll call it an experiment, which means if you think about your career, and it’s on a long sort of line, why don’t we take a small part of where you’re sitting at right now, and let’s just extract it out. Let’s find something that you can do. That is not going to impact in your career. If it doesn’t work, we’ll try another approach. So this is not the be all and end all of your whole entire life. But most times we put in a good framework and we set the experiment up for success.”

Johnathan had other great techniques for stepping out of your comfort zone, but instead I am going to share with you his final words – you can always contact Johnathan to find out more!

“Sometimes getting outside your comfort zone means confronting yourself and your professional self in a mirror and going, what am I? Where do I want to go? How do I need to position myself to get there? How do I understand the full range of what who I am and what I do and the value that I bring to an organisation?

“So part of getting out of your comfort zone means going on a journey of figuring out and finding out who and what you are. And that can be an incredibly rewarding experience and one that can really build and foster a greater sense of self confidence in people. So getting outside of your comfort zone can produce an enormous amount of reward, career acceleration, and purpose and fulfilment.”

Thank you so much Johnathan!

About Johnathan:

Johnathan is a Career Consultant who specialises in Professional Identity and Personal Brand Management. Using a structured method, he enables his clients to de-clutter their heads so they can gain a greater understanding of who and what they are, their capabilities and most importantly what makes them valuable. He also helps them increase their professional self-awareness so that they can move their careers forward with greater confidence and clarity of direction. Johnathan typically works with professionals at mid-career phase (Gen-X), to define their professional identity and then build a powerful Personal Brand to help them re-energise their careers and attract exciting opportunities. You can read more at johnmaltby.com. au or connect with him on LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/johnathanmaltby/

Support is everything

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Akansha came from a “bubble of not knowing how to do things on my own” to move to Australia to complete her Masters!

Akansha had never stayed anywhere without her immediate family prior to making this momentous decision.

“In my mind for first couple of weeks it kept feeling as if I was on a on a sleepover with the people [new roommates] and it felt like I was on a long holiday.

“And after a while, once uni started, that’s when it just all came out at once like ‘oh my god, I miss everyone.’”

Everything was new – from grocery shopping to living with strangers. That was mixed with studying and having to earn money to live on. The smallest thing was an adjustment – learning that ‘ta’ meant thank you not good bye for example!  The stress was overwhelming, and for the first time since she was born Akansha found herself in hospital. This added to her financial stress. To top it all off, she is working on getting her permanent residency to be able to stay in Australia. The process is very expensive and lot of jobs demand PR which is career limiting.

So, with all the above – plus regular racism – why would Akansha persevere?

“First of all, I had taken this decision that I wanted to experience what it is living outside of home and in a new country altogether. That kept me going.

“There’s always light at the tunnel and this is what my mum told me. My parents have been biggest support for me.”

Akansha’s parents continuously reminded her of her achievements – passing exams despite being hospitalised, getting her internship at Telstra – and also that she just had to keep at it.

Her sister also moved to Australia which helps a lot!

When I asked Akansha if there were benefits from stepping out of her comfort zone her whole face lit up with joy and pride! “I have grown in last three years so much that I did not in last 20 years of being India. I have learned finances, time management skills, and life experiences. I feel mature.

“From the time I stepped in Australia to the time right now I have grown mentally. And it doesn’t mean that there are not many challenges that keep me thinking and trying to get better. My attitude has changed. The way I look at things or the problems. I’m not saying it’s perfect all the time. Absolutely not. But definitely when I compare myself to what I was like in 2017 to what I am like in 2020… I guess I feel like I’m not a child. “

The advice Akansha has for people considering stepping out of their comfort zone is to just go for it. If you over think it you will see all the issues, if you focus on your end goal you will resolve those hurdles as you go “I have to paint that thing. And if you don’t have brushes, that’s the problem. And then you keep thinking ‘I don’t have brushes, I don’t have brushes.’ But if you if you think ‘yes, I will paint’ then you will go and buy brushes!”

Akansha’s last words were to create a support group and then include them in your celebrations! “I celebrate every year, so in February I was celebrating 3 years in Australia, and I had a celebratory dinner”

Thank you Akansha for sharing your story!

Just pick up the toothpick!

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Photo by Jason Briscoe on Unsplash
Words by me (Fiona) based on an interview with Sarah

Sarah agreed to be interviewed as she is trying to say yes as much as possible, she has found that stepping out of her comfort zone encourages her to do it more often.

We spoke specifically about Sarah learning Taekwondo. A few years ago Sarah was challenged by her coach to “do something that I wasn’t comfortable with doing”. Sarah is an outgoing person and often pushes herself, but she “tend[s] to do it in an area that I’m still quite knowledgeable in or experienced in or doesn’t fill me with too much fear”.

So at around 40 Sarah started learning Taekwondo. It was not just out of her comfort zone to learn something new, “I’ve never had really had a hobby, never really committed to anything that consistently I am entirely not sporty. I have a terrible memory and I’m not particularly coordinated.”

Sarah even found that there was a challenge within her challenge. “One of the biggest challenges I had was as part of doing Taekwondo. You shout to help signal when something’s completed, or when you hit someone if you’re sparring. And then despite being very vocal, and despite being very comfortable with being loud and singing to have quite a strong voice, I actually found that for a good six to eight weeks of me doing Taekwondo, I couldn’t do the shouting.”

When Sarah took on her coaches challenge, she didn’t even consider the benefits of doing so, she just accepted the challenge. But on reflection there were definitely upsides. Learning taekwondo had its own perks – fitness, improved coordination, an hour where work is not even considered, and meeting new people are some of those – but there were also benefits that were outside of those. For Sarah she learned that the initial discomfort doesn’t last very long, and you might get something fun from the experience! “And I think this stepping out of the comfort zone just made me realise that you know you never too old to do it either. So you are never too old to try a new career, try a new sport, pick up something new”

I asked Sarah (surprise!) about advice for someone else considering stepping out of their comfort zone “The same advice I got given, which was just pick up the toothpick. My coach taught me a game… where you picking up toothpicks, and get little bits of feedback every time until you pick up the correct toothpick. And when kids play the game, they just play it really quickly. And they just take the feedback and they just respond very quickly. But the older we get, we have more fear and there’s more embarrassment that stops us from doing things like stepping out of your comfort zone or trying new experiences or new jobs or new careers or whatever it is that you’re doing. And she has constantly said to me, just pick up the toothpick, just pick up the toothpick and I, probably on a weekly basis, think to myself just pick up the toothpick, Sarah, just have a go. And if it doesn’t work out, you don’t like it or you find that you’re not particularly good at it but you love it, then you’ve got more knowledge about yourself than you did before. So my advice would be the same that she gave me which was pick up the toothpick and you might get something great come out.”

Thank you, Sarah!